During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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