Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
as a side note pls kill me
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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