i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
