Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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