I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
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