did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
