chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
She needs sedatives and a leash
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize