If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
