It's like a parade of train wrecks.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
