Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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