I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
