You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
