I could have mohawked her pubes.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Randomize
