I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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