Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
try lime green
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect