Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
