Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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