there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
