so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
