If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
