Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
We have so much sex to catch up on
Randomize
Follow @tfln