Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
