It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize