My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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