How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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