Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Randomize
