I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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