I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
why didn't you poke me back
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
