I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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