I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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