im drinking this country out of the recession.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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