After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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