absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize