Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
