No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
