if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
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Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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