On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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