He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
