Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
