The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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