Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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