and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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