I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
The power of my boobs compel you
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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