i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
