I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize