question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Randomize
