My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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