just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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