just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
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