He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize
